You Will Not Control Me
by tbbookworm
Summary: A little bit of fluffiness -brotherly love?- that may later proceed into some slash -if I ever get around to updating this- . Just a short little story with Thor and Loki, and some memories.


**Here's the updated version! Sorry to all the people who must be raging at me for not updating my other fanfiction! I'm just a little busy at the moment, and I'm working really hard on Chapter 9 because... well, Loki... Agh, I can't say anything without giving spoilers!**

**Anyway, I hope that you guys enjoy this story.**

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"It is unfair! You do not fight like a true warrior!"

"And who will be the one to survive the next battle?"

Thor was grasping at straws as he attempted to teach his younger brother the magic was no way to fight. The blonde prince had been raised with sword, hammer and spear fighting his entire life.

His brother, however, secluded himself within the royal library on a daily basis; this made him anti-social, as well as a learned scholar and was adept at the magical arts. Their father was not proud of this, favouring Thor even at this age.

The two gods were in their teens; he was 18, and his ravenette brother 16.

"You know magic to be wrong. It holds no honour."

"And what if my magic saves mine or your life? Does that mean that we survived 'wrongly'?"

Thor heaved a great sigh and brushed away a few strands of blonde hair that had escaped his long braid.

"You still are not listening-"

"Of course I am listening," said the god quietly. "I am simply being stubborn and not respecting nor accepting your point as I believe it to be invalid. You should know me well enough to know that, Thor."

"Loki," he sighed, turning away from him and gripping his spear tightly. "I only hope that one day you will not be so stubborn."

"And what would the fun be in that?"

**…**

It was only a few months later that Loki began to have nightmares.

Thor was lying in bed one night, exhausted from a day of hunting and riding. He had hunted with his brother, as well as Volstagg and Fandral. He himself had downed a large stag, as well as a boar.

Loki had stayed a short distance behind the three of them on his horse, not a part of the hunting party as he sought to explore the forest. Thor wondered if the god had even wanted to join them at all, or if he had simply wanted to escape the library for a time.

There was a loud scream from a few rooms down, at which he sat up immediately. It was a scream of fear, not pain. He knew that only the royal family and a few nobles, as well as some fair maidens, stayed in this part of the palace.

The blonde prince threw the light blankets off of him and slid his feet onto the warm floor, grabbing a robe from a nearby chair as he stood up. Whoever had screamed may still need help, be it only the comfort of a soft hand or voice.

Thor stealthily slid out of his room, closing the door behind him without a sound and began walking towards where he thought the scream had originated from. He guessed that the screamer must have had a nightmare of some sort.

Another scream jolted him and made him jump, but it also helped him to locate the room within which it had come from. It was his brother's room, a shock to him as he remembered the ravenette to be a sound sleeper; Thor knocked cautiously on the door before entering.

Amazingly, Loki was still asleep, though the sheets were tangled between his legs with his torso exposed to the hot, summery, night air. His ebony curls were plastered against his sweaty neck, and his dark lashes were tinged with water, presumably tears.

He looked so helpless there, tears drying slowly on his ivory cheeks, that Thor quietly closed the door and leant against it. His brother did not awaken, though he frowned and with a moan, flipped onto his back.

A few seconds later, he gave yet another scream, but even though this one was quieter, it was just as blood-curdling; new tear droplets began streaming down the god's face.

"Loki," Thor said sympathetically, sneaking over the smooth stone floor to sit down on the plush double bed. The god did not stir, but sighed a little through parted lips. The blonde tenderly laid a hand on his brother's arm, the skin hot to the touch.

'What are you dreaming about?" he wondered silently, wiping the tears off of Loki's pale skin. 'What is it that has you disturbed so, to make you scream?'

The ravenette's mouth gave a shuddering sigh, and his breathing steadied, as did his hummingbird heart. Thor drew away his hand and returned it to his lap, thinking to leave Loki to his now more peaceful slumber.

An ivory hand reached out and brushed across his forearm, leaving faint trails of fire along his skin.

"Stay," there was a whisper, though whether it was directed towards him or from in Loki's dream, he did not know. What he did decide to do was stay until his brother had at least stopped crying. After that, he would make the decision of whether to leave or not.

It saddened Thor to see the ebony-haired god in such a manner, the stubborn and resilient exterior stripped away to reveal raw emotion. This was not the proud and quietly fury-bound Loki that he loved and accepted as a brother; this counter-part, would that he was awake, looked as if to spill all personal secrets.

Maybe… No. The blonde prince shook his head. To pry upon his brother's privacy whilst he was this vulnerable went against his honour; Loki would tell him in his own time, be it in the near future or the few minutes prior to his death.

For now, he was content to keep a night-watch over the god. Besides, he did not need the sleep. His brother was the most important issue to him at this time.

Thor sighed and ran appraising eyes over his brother. He did not know much about him nowadays, though in the past they had been close friends and almost inseparable. But they had grown apart in the last few years, the blonde prince fighting more with warrior friends like Hogun, Fandral and Volstagg. They called themselves 'The Warrior Three' and followed Thor obediently in every matter.

Loki had no wish to participate in what he looked upon as 'droll and unamusing' training, preferring his cosy corner in the royal library. If Thor ever had a matter that he wanted to discuss, the first person he would turn to was his brother. The god was a silver-tongued speaker, weaving the most innocent of lies with ease. It did not please the other god that this was sometimes how Loki got his way; by lying.

Thor regarded the truth as the only way to perceive things; telling lies only corrupted the world and all of those around you.

**...**

It took Loki more than 7 nights before he finally awoke from a nightmare, and he nearly screamed again as he saw his brother sitting on a chair beside him like a dark apparition.

"What are you doing in my room?" he gasped, pulling his sheets up around him and blushing furiously.

"Watching you. You have been having nightmares of late." Part of Loki was touched at the thought of his brother sacrificing sleep to keep an eye on him; then again, Thor was still watching him sleep.

"So, then, how long?"

"A week, maybe longer. Loki, I have to ask. Is there anything bothering you?" Loki looked as if he was about to cry.

Thor could make no sense of this. Why would his genuine worry upset his brother so much?

"I don't remember anything," the ravenette sniffled, realizing that he had already been crying and began to rub furiously at his cheeks.

"Then we can both only guess what is frightening you so. I wish I could help you more."

"I do not need help," said Loki angrily, curling up in a ball and turning away from his brother. "Just leave me alone." His voice was slightly muffled by the pillow he had buried his face in.

There was silence for a few minutes, and then heavy footfalls.

"Know that you can come and see me if you find yourself in trouble, whether it be late or early." The door opened and closed quietly, and Loki could feel his absence and the solitude.

He was alone, and he heaved a great sigh as he turned onto his back. The god should have realized that he was having nightmares when he did not remember his dreams. Maybe there was some sort of spell that he could find in the library tomorrow, to see if he could unlock the hidden secrets.

For now... Loki regretted that he had ordered Thor away in such a hurry. The company would have been helpful in returning him to his slumber, but for that he had only himself to blame.

The god began to hum softly to lull himself back to slumber, a song that he had found in an old record book of Midgardian origin.

"The silence keeps it easy, keeps you safe for the moment. As your walking away, your footsteps get louder... All you needed was time, but now time will destroy us."

It did not take long for his words to slowly fade away as he fell asleep again, an he hoped that he would not wake in the morning to more worried faces.

**...**

Thor entered the royal library at the usual time to drag Loki out to the training grounds. Odin did not excuse his youngest son from his princely duties, even if he already had an older son that happily exceed his expectations.

"Loki? Come, we must do our daily training!" The prince looked around a few bookshelves, but still didn't find him. "Loki?" He continued to search the library.

There was a faint sigh from around the corner and Thor immediately crouched, heart pounding loudly as he wondered what he would find. He cautiously peeked around the corner.

Loki was slid down against one wall, a faint haze surrounding him. The prince suspected that it had something to do with a spell he had weaved; there were other things to worry about, though, as he noticed the ebony-haired god had a long cut that threaded in a strange symbol on his forearm.

His eyes were half-closed, and he appeared to be whispering something as blood stained the silver-embroided green tunic that was a gift from their mother a few months ago.

"You watch me bleed..."

"Loki! What are you doing?" yelled the blonde prince as he sprung from his hiding place. The god opened his eyes a little, shards of broken glass in a soft face, and smiled.

"Hell, Thor," Loki said, frowning as he barely managed to form the words. "I found out how to stop the nightmares. You'll never guess how..." He began closing his eyes before he coughed suddenly and sat up with a jolt.

"How do I get through this barrier?" asked his brother, pushing his shoulder strongly against the haze. "It seems... Impenetrable," he huffed, trying harder.

"You can help me... Isn't that right?" The ravenette carelessly waved a hand so that Thor fell through the bubble and almost into his lap.

It was so obviously the answer, wasn't it? Thought Loki.

4 years had passed sine the nightmares had begun, and over those years, Loki had grown out of his awkward lankiness and into a long-limbed god. He often spent his days inside now, to the envy of a few maidens, and only occasionally exited to do a bit of training. This made him extremely pale, which made his viridian eyes even more prominent beneath his dark, black eyelashes.

Thor hadn't noticed this until he had nearly fallen on his brother, and to his shame, he began blushing and quickly pulled away.

"You're still bleeding. What have you done to yourself, brother?" Loki's expression darkened even as he stared at the prince.

Thor was 22 now, a proud member of the royal society. His sun-kissed skin was bourne of the eternal sunlight that the prince found himself in, and the maidens giggled when he passed by them. He had, against his father's will, grown his blonde hair until it hung down to his shoulder blades, though he kep it in a braid nearly all of the time. Occasionally, whilst training, he would let it loose. If you ever needed to find Thor during the day, he was sure to be on the training field with his fellow friends and warriors, as you could teel by the muscles that rippled through his entire body.

Loki flicked his eyes away for a minute and hissed when he felt the god press something soft against his arm, looking back to see that Thor had taken off his red tunic and pressed it to his arm. He almost had a mind to shove him away, but the cool fabric felt good against the burning. And besides, the ravenette had to include Thor in his plans.

"Thank you, Thor," he said quietly, putting an ivory hand over The God of Thunder's with a faint grin. The blonde blushed brightly, almost turning the same color as his shirt.

"Why did you do this to yourself? Even if we are gods, I have never seen so much blood from a wound before, and I have never seen such a strange symbol as this." He made as if to lift away the tunic and brush fingers over it, but Loki spread his fingers and locked them onto Thor's.

"It does not matter," he purred, leaning closer. "Let me up, won't you?" The prince put an arm around his shoulders and lifted him up, a slight too high though, as Loki's toes barely touched the ground. He set him down carefully as if he were fragile, which the ravenette sneered at.

"I hope that you have not looked outside the barrier."

"Not as of yet. What lies beyond it?" Thor asked curiously, twisting a shoulder as if to turn and look out into it's secrets.


End file.
